Elly | Counseling Psychologist
Region: GB
Thursday 03 September 2026 07:10:00 GMT
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eatsalt7 :
I spent 2.5 years over explaining and reassuring an over grown man child who projected his nonsense on me and triangulated constantly. My central nervous system is fried.
2026-09-03 11:07:21
373
GhostJ :
After a while it starts to make you question your own reality. I literally started to think I was the problem. Which made me evaluate myself and start healing areas. As I began to heal the wedge between us grew even more and I became even more evil in his eyes. But that healing helped me see my reality again and what I was up against. That’s when I began to decenter him and focus on me and me alone. I am still in the throes of grief but I’m walking with it instead of fighting it.
2026-09-03 19:04:56
165
🔮 :
15years in and still trying to explain this to him. I’m so tireddddd
2026-09-21 12:16:27
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Kim Diesel :
Even if you have the most solid, bullet proof explanation and their projection / accusation lacks any sense of logic, you’re NEVER going to be able to rationalize with an irrational person. They’re committed to misunderstanding you. I’m an over explainer by nature, and being in this dynamic makes it 1000x worse. My nervous system is SHOT. Meanwhile, the person projecting is always lying or being the thing they’re accusing you of.
2026-09-03 21:17:16
137
AndersThorseth :
It was such a big realization for me that no amount of good times is worth being someone’s “go to villain”.
2026-09-21 02:21:16
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Pamela :
Finding it stems from their upbringing. I was raised by an amazing single mom just me and her in a "calm space". She was raised by 2 parents in a very unhealthy "control" environment and they would have called my situation "damaged" 😂 But now she is not emotionally aware, lashes out instinctively, and can't emotionally connect to actual "love" . Even after 25 years. I'm sticking around because there has been EXTREME life changes but now see there is going to have to "life learned therapy" that was just granted to me in my upbringing.
2026-09-22 04:40:42
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vancey10 :
You just explained my ex to a tea. Hence why she an ex now
2026-09-22 08:41:57
2
GalaxyDragon :
when ever we had arguments there were always 3 parties involved. Her, her projection of me and me. It was hard to get a word in edgewise.
2026-09-03 11:36:43
67
AutisME :
Exactly this. I swear, when he was talking to me about me… the opinions he had about me were so shocking. Through his eyes I was a terrible person. It truly broke my heart, the way he saw me. I actually pride myself in being a an extremely loyal and kind partner and the way he twisted my character was just horrible. I felt like he needed to do that because he felt immensely triggered by my kindness because it shone a light on all the ways he was horrible to me.
2026-09-21 09:17:50
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Yvonne Kinsella :
this is 100 % my situation right now
2026-09-03 11:12:48
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Kanagawa Hokusai :
Im like this to my partner. I feel guilty for being like this. But looking deeper into it, i realized i became like this because of the lies, manipulation, gaslighting and abandonment i endured for over a decade. People like me are not necessarily emotionally abusive, sometimes we are the ones who are abused and now we are viewing everything with fear.
2026-09-18 09:19:45
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Allgucci :
Not going to lie… Im like this and i hate myself for being like this….
2026-09-03 14:15:13
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dyycjnxzu8qe :
best combined with being the victim in the end.
2026-09-04 20:30:06
11
Debby Ann :
I continuously defend a version of myself that only exists in his own head. He sees me completely differently than everyone else in the world. It’s exhausting.
2026-09-16 12:18:05
6
irahayesthepitbull :
Explaining never gets anywhere. Only admitting they are right settles that ego. Get out, I wasted 15 years.
2026-09-05 12:16:52
42
Shrek :
🫳🎤 sick to death of this shit, completely blinded by their own interpretation and there cant possibly be any other explanation other than the one they have invented.....I can genuinley explain i did something for X, Y and Z reason only to be told no you did because of A,B and C. The juice isnt worth the squeeze....
2026-09-03 10:16:55
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Denise Adams :
It is so exhausting trying to be in a relationship with a narcissistic person that you happen to love, and you are always blamed for every single thing
2026-09-03 17:28:00
17
jess242 :
Been there. Explaining myself led to her accusing me of gaslighting even though she kinda did that to me
2026-09-20 09:47:30
1
Han :
Constantly having to prove I don’t have ill-intent is exhausting
2026-09-11 04:00:31
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Tori@ :
Emotional abuse is the worst id rather get a smack! Although neither is healthy nor should be tolerated obviously …
2026-09-05 06:44:31
10
Upside down 🍍 :
And then as soon as you move on they think you have changed and become everything they wanted with your new partner.
2026-09-03 10:53:36
25
drome :
I made a mistake. I did something out of good intentions that didn't play out like I thought it would. I lied to her initially and then told her the truth. Now she doesn't trust me, says that I wouldn't have hurt her if I cared about her and loved her. Suddenly despite us both supporting each other through some difficult periods in our lives, she doesn't believe that I still love her and care about her. Nothing I say is received. Her response is immediate blame and anger. I just can't get anything through to her..
2026-09-03 09:09:29
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Dwain :
ok so I really want to learn. How would you differentiate between a person projecting their insecurities on you vs. there being a genuine addressable concern?
2026-09-03 22:22:41
5
korryconnell :
This is my husband. He does go to therapy but I don’t think he’s truthful because he sees me as a monster. “The most negative person he’s ever met”. So how is therapy going to help him?
2026-09-03 20:33:00
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Lyle McLovin :
can relate. you described it accurately
2026-09-03 16:49:40
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