@narcfamilies: Hi, it's Juliana! There are two things I'd like to focus on here. 1.) When you go through years of them: – Yelling at you. – Hurting you. – Invading your privacy. – Ignoring your boundaries. – Making you feel guilty. Your brain starts to learn: “This person getting close to me doesn't always feel good.” So when they open their arms, your body might instinctively: – Tense up. – Want to move backward. – Hold your breath. – Feel irritated. – Feel trapped. – Feel gross or nauseous. Why? Because your brain isn't responding to the hug that's happening right now. It's responding to the years of negative experiences you've had with the person trying to hug you. 2.) You often don't actually want the hug. But you also don't want the consequences of not hugging them. They might: – Guilt-trip you. – Get angry with you. – Act deeply hurt. – Accuse you of not loving them. – Give you the silent treatment. – Turn themselves into the victim. So eventually, hugging them can stop feeling like something you're choosing to do and start feeling like something you have to do to avoid what happens if you don't. And that's where that “icky” feeling can come from. Because while you're hugging them, part of you is saying: “I don't want this.” But another part of you is saying: “Just do it.” If you need someone to talk to about all of this, you can always send me a DM or schedule a session with me. My team and I help people heal from narcissistic abuse, and many of us have experienced it ourselves, so we're here if you need us. To your healing, Juliana ❤️‍🩹

Narcissistic Families

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Thursday 27 August 2026 02:50:48 GMT