@shea.fairbanks: Most men don't lose a great woman all at once. It happens in small decisions that feel reasonable in the moment and only make sense in hindsight. I know because I've lived a few of these myself, in relationships years ago that taught me exactly what not to repeat. 1. He mistook her calm for boring. Chaos felt like chemistry for so long that peace registered as nothing happening at all. 2. He got comfortable and stopped putting in effort. Not out of malice. Just assuming she'd always be there, because she always had been. 3. He never learned to sit with her hard emotions. The second things got heavy, he'd pull back or shut down, and she slowly stopped bringing him the real stuff. 4. He confused her patience for permission. She kept giving him time to grow. He read that as evidence nothing needed to change. 5. He never dealt with his own baggage, so it kept landing on her. She wasn't just loving him. She was managing wounds he never actually looked at himself. 6. He didn't realize what he had until someone else did. It's rarely the loss itself that hits hardest. It's watching someone else get the version of her he never fully showed up for. None of this happens in one moment. It's a slow accumulation of small choices that quietly add up to losing something that took years to build. I've been that guy before, more than once, and it's part of why the relationship I'm in now looks nothing like the ones that taught me these lessons, because I finally learned them well enough not to repeat them. A healthy relationship doesn't let you get away with any of this quietly. It actually challenges you to stay present when it's uncomfortable, instead of drifting the way I used to without even noticing it was happening. Save this if you're realizing this in real time. Send it to the man still taking his person for granted. DM me CAPACITY for your free assessment, and let's get an actual baseline on where your nervous system is at. -Shea

Erin Rose :

We notice everything, just don’t call everything out.

A L I S H A :

Even harder when it’s all of these

A Bird 418 :

Need to find some new men.. you described my situation every time

cmp1208807 :

Did all of this.

EdmYeg :

3. makes no sense. Why would he leave then?

Bethany Burrows :

Or maybe she’s not a great woman lol

BloomAfterRain 🇨🇦 ❌ :

4 & 5 are very common

Golden Eagle27 :

lack of morals too

Daydreamer :

Don’t fall in love with potential ladies. I’ve done it, and you end up carrying a burden that wasn’t yours and questioning yourself. It’s true! When they show you who they are, let them and move on

PerfectlyPam💋 :

Yes. I was too boring, too helpful, too much of a homebody, didn’t like to party and drink. I didn’t do chaos or drama. 🤷‍♀️….

Aggiegirl86 :

Mine walked out of 29 years for a chain-smoking alcoholic. Make it make sense. I wasn’t a bitch and I wasn’t loud and dramatic. My daughter says it’s because he went back to who he really was which was not a great man.

Elizabeth :

He ended it and found out I was engaged four years after the breakup through a friend of mine. He didn't know what to say for several seconds until he finally told her, "Tell her I said good for her." I didn't pick up the breadcrumbs. I realized my self-worth. Blocked 20+ years later on FB and IG by him (never contacted him or reached out), been in no contact for years and he still stares at me in front of his wife and kids in public.

Janene Marie :

You pretty much nailed it

firelilly :

Crazy thing is all these thing happen in my previous relationship that I left and he was so critical of him. Saying he was thankful that my ex fumbled me so he could be my man…now he’s doing the same shit

KARENN :

It's God's gift to a woman. We can love a man as long as we can handle it until we are totally drained and tired. We cannstill manage to hold everything selflessly. But when God tell us to let go, then we surrender it to Him alone. As he said in His word in Proverbs 3:15. He won't let His daughter cry for a man who didn't treasure and value her. 🔥✨

therealjennstarrs :

all of the above

MM❌ :

Yeah

meldridge :

Avoidance is cowardice.

Patti :

Yes

meekerh :

Current situation

Lanny :

Fergie!! :

Dated an avoidant he cheated on me and then. Ended up marrying the girl with no job no car and no accountability or ambition. Toxic relationship and anytime she leaves him after a huge fight he texts me

Tanya :

We all want what we don’t have. Especially when you lose it

ThatzsoRachel 🦋 :

💯💯💯💯 Facts 🔥🔥🔥