Nick Matiash | The Evolved Man
Region: US
Tuesday 08 September 2026 11:48:40 GMT
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Blondie :
Always on my fyp not his.! 🤦♀️
2026-09-08 14:39:59
122
More Than a Mom :
He has caused most the harm. My faults lie in over functioning and enabling his passivity. My role during reconciliation is to remain open to the possibility of change and 1) clearly communicate boundaries 2) recognize genuine improvement 3) don’t move the goal posts 4) allow new behavior as new evidence 5) work on releasing resentment about things that genuinely have changed 6) DON’T TRUST PROMISES THAT HAVENT YET BEEN DEMONSTRATED
2026-09-09 15:31:49
37
Cora 🖤 :
I stuck around too many times. He never took accountability and never fixed a damn thing.
2026-09-08 13:43:53
141
Oilydischarge :
5mo into our in-home separation after 15yrs. My lack of communication caused emotional harm and we are trying to work through it. We have a great bond and friendship and we decided to focus on the kids as the main goal and that seems to have created a trickle down effect to us and last night she explained that she likes where we are at. Stay the course
2026-09-08 16:46:01
8
doggybottompatter🐕 :
I have this belief that women are born to do the work and we do the work every day to keep hope alive that our relationships will be successful. I also think that when we do even more work we eventually learn that we worked much harder than we should have, we stayed too long and gave too much. Now I’m learning I need to apologize to him for staying in the beginning and making him believe that his behaviors were acceptable to me when in fact they weren’t. I deceived him, I deceived myself and in doing so I caused harm for both of us.
2026-09-08 14:41:49
19
Allison Wonderland :
This! It is WORK to stay and allow space for him to grow
2026-09-08 16:11:11
36
Ellie :
Should I send to him?
2026-09-08 17:41:10
1
perpetualhermit :
Part of me feels like this is propaganda to make me stay even longer. So, respectfully, I’m still leaving and I have done so much work and it really sucks that I have to still stick around while I figure out how to leave without ruining my husband’s life—but my sticking around to keep things running while I figure it out should not be interpreted as me giving him another chance to earn back anything. It should only be interpreted as me doing everything within my power to keep things as stable as possible for our kids. Make things right. Make things right without expecting that I will fold and fawn and stay and try anymore. Because I still deserve for things to be made right, and I deserve for my husband to respect my autonomy, and our children deserve to be happy and loved, too. Sticking around is a transitional phase.
2026-09-08 22:31:41
4
xoxo, cj •relationship burnout :
From my perspective speaking about the burned out pursuer dynamic, I couldn’t agree more. When the emotional engine of the relationship breaks down or burns out, they don’t have capacity to “try” anymore - not until there is real proof that their effort will be reciprocated or valued or produce meaningful fruit. Because in the past, their efforts likely left them only resentful, lonely, embarrassed and hurt.
2026-09-08 23:16:07
2
bluejacketjaden :
But she left
2026-09-09 01:46:11
0
user691594360 :
As a husband going through this, I can’t tell you how incredibly suitable this is to my situation and a very powerful message. So much clarity gained in a few seconds of messaging. THANK YOU
2026-09-09 02:11:44
2
Zal :
Living with the trauma every minute of the day, is way more work than anything the cheater side is doing.
2026-09-09 08:36:39
7
Richard :
But what if they left for 4 months came back and still don’t want show up in the marriage
2026-09-08 19:54:40
1
Brandon :
I needed to hear this..
2026-09-08 12:58:57
10
GhostJ :
He said it takes 50/50 and I’m not doing anything. I said I beg to differ. It’s now finally equal because I’m not overcompensating.
2026-09-09 20:23:26
3
Mags :
If you want to change you, change you. Waiting for someone else to go first is immature.
2026-09-09 12:39:44
2
Kari :
Can I show him this
2026-09-08 15:38:52
0
user2606052099315 :
Everyone thinks it’s always the men. I’m doing the staying right now
2026-09-08 15:54:29
0
BamaBoutique :
Someone please send this to my husband.
2026-09-08 19:43:54
1
CCSeeMe :
👏👏👏 And how often they refuse to do the work but demand she stays and “does her work” (Changes to be okay with infidelity, no communication, no desire to be around her, and accept emotional abuse). *sigh*
2026-09-09 03:22:47
1
13👽🖤🛸 :
hell never admit it, I'm the villan in his story.
2026-09-09 15:10:48
1
░m░a░t░t░e • Friend :
sure, but don't self abandon and assume that it's you that has to do the work. half the time it's going to be the other person. if you've had this experience occur before it's probably more than half the time
2026-09-08 18:49:12
1
orbitzzed :
mine is doing the surface work, but refusing to dig in and figure out why/how it happened in the first place
2026-09-09 16:59:45
0
learningtosee :
Oh my god. Thank you
2026-09-09 17:12:49
0
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