xReddingtoNx :
well I wish someone could talk to me about , I lied to her about something about my life in past , too many lies and for years , I had to confess it to her lately when she went away for military for 15 weeks , and I confesed during her first week of training so she not sleeping well she not doing well she exhausted and all ,, and then shocked and hurt and she said I broke her trust with a bulldozer,,etc , and she,, she got so angry and mad on texte , but at the same time she didn't say we done or we will divorce or separate , she just said I don't know for now what I will do about you , I'm not sleeping well to make any knowing decision anytime soon ,, etc and I told her I will fix it ,,etc and tell me how if you want me to do something ,,and she said you fucked up you figure it out ,,etc and I'm really going to be 100% honest with her and show her that I'm changing and real actions and all ,, but then today when I mentioned about meeting her soon in few weeks ,, she says I really don't want to talk to you or see you at the moment , until I come back , meaning in January 2027 ,, and I'm so lost and confused I don't want to lose her and I really want to rebuild her trust , I don't know if she's going to leave or going to lean and soften slowly with time or what , we're far from each other for now , and I stopped flooding her with messages and stuff ,, I just say good morning ,, good luck for training ,,etc and wish her a good day with a small heart ,, and then goodnight,, I stopped opening the subject and giving her time and space ,, it's been a week so far , so the subject still new ,, and I'm just so scared , my brain thinking in a bad way all the time , I don't know what to do or to think , and if time will make her calm down more and stuff or what , I don't know , I just don't want to lose her at all , wish I could know instead of being in the middle like that
2026-10-03 15:15:30