@kornelijacollins: After I shared that I was at a breakfast with Martha Stewart during NYFW, my DMs exploded with “how did you get there?” It made me think about the soft skills that have opened the most doors for me, professionally, socially and honestly just in life. Here are 5: 1. Be easy to work with and be around. Answer people. Be on time. Do what you said you were going to do. And just generally don’t make things more complicated than they need to be. I’ve learned that people will go out of their way to include you again when they know they can rely on you and actually enjoy having you there. 2. Put yourself in the room. When I was a makeup artist, I used to literally look up agencies, figure out who worked there and introduce myself. I still do some version of that today. Go to the event even if you don’t know anyone. Send the DM. Ask for the introduction. You’d be surprised how much can happen simply because you put yourself somewhere something could happen. 3. Talk to people when you don’t need anything from them. This is probably one of the biggest ones. Stay in touch. Send someone something that made you think of them. Congratulate them when something good happens. Support their work. Some of the best relationships I have today started years before there was ever a reason for either of us to need something from the other. 4. Learn how to talk to anyone. I will talk to the person standing alone, the person next to me in line, someone whose outfit I love. I also have a rule at events that I want to meet at least two new people before I leave. You don’t need to work the entire room. Just get comfortable starting a conversation. 5. Actually be interested in people. Ask the second question. Remember what someone told you last time. Ask how the thing they were working on turned out. People are interesting when you actually pay attention to them. And being someone who pays attention will take you very far.
