@narcissisticpartners: Hi, it's Juliana! The “narcissistic” thing here isn't the mess. It's the reason behind the mess. Let me explain... Narcissistic people are some of the most selfish and self-centered people in the world. So thoughts like “How will this affect them?” don't naturally cross their mind. If they're okay with something, they automatically expect you to be okay with it too. That's why they can sit there playing video games with pizza left on the couch, a kitchen full of dirty dishes, and a filthy floor in a space you two share and not see the problem. Now, if you're in a relationship with someone like this, a mistake you might be making is asking them to clean up after themselves. Why do I think this is a mistake? Think about it like this. Do you think about all the insects living in your grass before you cut it? No. But not because you're a bad person. It's because their existence is just so insignificant to you that it doesn't even cross your mind to think about how your actions might affect them. And for the insects, I think that's worse. Because if you were simply a bad person, maybe, just maybe, there's hope one day you'll become a good person and change your ways. But because their existence means so little to you... you're never going to change. You don't have a reason to. The same goes for narcissistic partners. Our thoughts, feelings, wants, needs, etc. are so insignificant to them that they're just never going to change their ways. At least, that's my opinion. Does this mean you have to just shut up and take it? No. But if the “owner” of the lawn you're living in keeps cutting the grass without caring how it affects you, maybe it's time to find a new lawn to live in. You know what I mean? If you need someone to talk to about all of this, you can always send me a DM or schedule a session with me. My team and I help people heal from narcissistic abuse, and many of us have experienced it ourselves, so we're here if you need us. To your healing, Juliana ❤️‍🩹

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Wednesday 16 September 2026 03:00:10 GMT