@tisheilajustice: Some of the highest-functioning people I work with will tell you directly, “I’m struggling,” and still say they are doing fine because they remember a time when things were much worse. When your tolerance for distress and despair is extremely high, survival can start to feel like wellness. You can keep working, parenting, showing up, answering texts, and getting things done while privately feeling exhausted, disconnected, overwhelmed, or hopeless. The fact that someone is functioning does not tell you how much it is costing them to function. A big part of my work is bridging the gap between what people can see and what someone is actually experiencing internally. So when someone tells you they are struggling, listen, even when their life looks “fine” from the outside. Therapists and support systems, we have to learn to take the quiet disclosures seriously too. If this resonates with you, go to the link in my bio and sign up for my newsletter for more conversations about the mental health struggles that often go unseen. Disclaimer: This content is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for individual mental health treatment. #womensmentalhealth #traumatherapist #depression #mensmentalhealth #cptsd

Saggedy Ann :

moon :

ah, damn, and here i thought i was handling things well

Human Shoelace :

I have double edged distress tolerance. I feel like my threshold is super high and nothing bothers me but as soon as something gets through I’m a goddamn baby and I make everything everyone else’s problem

foxglove9999 :

The looks that people give me when I’m just talking about my life are wild. I’ve had to realize, not everyone lives like this.

Cate Hayworth :

vibes but I replaced my therapist with an esthetician because it costs about $125 less a session 🤣

Kaelyn :

you are very detailed, insightful and intelligent. i appreciate the work you have done in this space because you are the first person i have used language that i use in my mind to describe myself or my situation. it’s challenging that when i speak to professionals, i cannot describe it in this way because the response i usually get is something placating, passive aggressive, or it goes right over their head. i would normally not leave a comment on a public social media post under my real page because im afraid to be seen and perceived but i felt compelled because i felt deeply understood for the first time. thank you.

Phoenix Pigeon :

Ayyy it’s a me a Mario

catzinatrenchcoat :

Kitty 🎧🎶 :

Saving this to show my therapist

Elle🌙🦋 :

I often don’t understand just how hard something was until after I’m past it

???% :

truthfully i don't fucking know how much im suffering unless it's like. a lot

unchartedastrologyllc :

I wanted more people to talk about this with the Lindsay Clancy case

Elizabeth Cagle James :

hey, thanks for making me feel less crazy. I tell people and then they get mad because “people don’t just tell others that stuff”.

Vaxxed Caffed Need A Nap :

I was having major abdominal surgery earlier this year and I was not worried or hesitant about it at all and when I thought about that I was like well this is easy compared to everything else. I’ve been through worse.

ih8ithere :

you can't not be fine though 💀 life won't stop for you if you aren't fine 😭 especially if you come from a religious family that's slipping from middle class back into lower class

Lady Peanuts :

I’m constantly telling myself that it’s not that bad but I know how bad it is

queersewist :

Foster kids : ( and kids that have grown up in DV situations

Courtney 🥰 :

Wellllll this is awkward…..

Jean :

It’s always fun to try and explain this to new providers. My PHQ 9 and GAD scores are always alarming… but I’ve also been way worse.

Lauren :

We say we are fine to make the conversation shorter bc we DID previously articulate the distress and asking for help - over, and over- but we never got help. There is no point in asking for help a 500th time, when saying “I’m fine” makes the conversation easier. It has nothing to do with comparison, or reward. It’s not deep. We are experiencing trauma and prioritizing effectively as a survival skill. An unproductive conversation is optional, and “I’m fine” is an opt out.

Sacred Sound Singer :

when I tell ppl about my life they always say I'm doing a recipe for burnout bc I work multiple jobs. But with cost of living so high these days it's hard not to.

Summer :

I was at work and my co worker said, you need to breathe! I'm pretty sure you held your breath walking that whole hallway... 😅 not wrong. Always in crisis but have to function.