@thesoulful_writer: There are things you desire as a young man that, as you grow older, you become content to admire on other people. Not on you You can still understand their appeal. You simply no longer wish to bring them home. I think of men who carry guns as part of their daily lives. A little wind parts a coat, and there it is, resting on the hip. In younger years, perhaps your eyes would have lingered. There was something about it—the authority, the danger, the impression of a man prepared for whatever might come. These days, I find myself thinking about the weight of carrying it. Going out for bread with it. Sitting among friends with it. Coming home and finding somewhere to put it before embracing the ordinary evening. I do not think I would love that. I know men have their reasons. Good reasons probably. Some carry because of what their work demands; others because of something life has already done to them. I would not pretend to know what it costs each man to feel safe. But for myself, growing older has brought a longing for an uneventful day. To sit somewhere without much concern for who is entering. To let a disagreement end with words. To return home with bread, answer a familiar voice from the kitchen, and put my keys on the table. There was a time I might have envied the man whose coat opened to reveal a weapon. Now I find myself wondering whether he ever misses leaving the house without it.

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2026-09-26 05:04:58

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