Kelly- CPTSD Scapegoat Healing
Region: US
Friday 02 October 2026 20:08:31 GMT
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🏳️🌈carebearstare🏳️⚧️ :
my brother is 15 years younger. I stayed nearby to develop a relationship with him, so that he always had someone safe. I wish I could've taken him away from them but legally there was no way. so I just tried to be near and normal. when he was 18, I had the opportunity to move 1000 miles away so I did. I didn't want to leave him but I couldn't be the scapegoat anymore. over the last 10 years her abuse of him escalated. now I'm doing everything I can to help him get out too. she's somehow kept him dependent while also constantly using his basic needs as leverage to make him do what they want/regulate their nervous systems through abusing him. he'll be graduating college in a couple of months and then he'll be with me and those demons can figure out old age alone.
2026-10-03 10:27:07
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Mhammad :
I don’t care anymore lol. I’ve tried up until 6 months ago when I’ve been healing for 1.5 years. Once i started safety practices and found safety within myself it didn’t take long until i stopped trying to change them. Now I’m only working on saving myself. It doesn’t make sense to save someone that is actively harming you when they’re so disconnected from their humanity and aren’t able to see yours. that’s self abandonment.
2026-10-04 14:11:49
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Mel❌ :
I tried. it hurt me more. now I'm estranged and at peace. thank you for the confirmation that it wasn't me
2026-10-03 09:21:17
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Suekpurple :
I am a convenient scapegoat. I don't live close so I can near call them out. I have no desire to do that anymore. I have matches their efforts in the relationship which those efforts are almost none. I did this almost 2 years ago. I have told some key family members what I have done and that I saw no reason to be a part of something where I am not wanted. I am okay with being their scapegoat. I have accepted that it will never change. I life is more peaceful and much less stressful.
2026-10-05 00:03:11
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Em Free :
Wouldn’t waste my energy
2026-10-02 22:18:24
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Yaz :
In my experience they don’t want to understand and change
2026-10-02 20:28:12
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KallesinTehanu :
don't do it! danger! danger!
2026-10-02 22:54:43
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sausagepot :
No no , my mother just puts her head between her knees and her hands on her ears .
2026-10-03 05:03:37
1
SandNew :
Don’t even consider that! 😏😌
2026-10-04 14:23:45
1
Meanie-weenie :
learned that the hard way when i tried to stand up for myself a couple days after my 20th birthday and got my door kicked down 😭
2026-10-02 21:03:47
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Rachael :
I learned from my last ex it’s best not to confront them and take them to therapy. My therapist ended up calling the cops on my ex bc I told him I wasn’t bringing him back to my home. He was stranded. He threw a fit. He had already hit me a few times. When I left my parents I didn’t say anything. I just stop communicating and of course they didn’t contact me either. Except a few times after a year or so. I didn’t respond. I then blocked them. Moved 7 hours away.
2026-10-03 03:36:13
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Susan :
Ain’t gonna happen.
2026-10-02 21:06:39
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Trace :
You can’t and it’s not even worth trying — just walk away. They’re not going to change. When life events happen and you see how they react it can be quite confronting to realise you don’t actually know these people at all and that what you thought was a lifetime of shared family experiences was in reality a complete illusion.
2026-10-02 23:50:33
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Rose :
there is nothing you could say or do to change anyone, walk away
2026-10-03 03:03:08
3
amy :
Having fielded this my whole life, having made attempts for discussion and being shut down, I realise how strongly they will protect their positions. Once anybody gets into protective mode, they will not shift the scapegoat sake. Distance.- emotional distance is the only solution.
2026-10-02 20:22:18
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Fadia Abu Samra :
no. thx.
2026-10-03 17:13:25
1
megg :
I've tried for years. Didn't work
2026-10-04 10:49:51
0
Bing Bing Bong :
Nope, they can’t. I confronted my sister to see how nasty she actually is. It was worth it because then I knew WHY I’d been so afraid to speak up all these years. The vilest attack, smear campaign and attempt to have me committed meant it was so clear to me why I am the way I am. I’d always shamed myself for fawning and freezing, then engaging in pseudo hostility. Now I can see my coping strategies were how I survived! 💜
2026-10-02 23:28:33
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TeeZ246 :
I have called it out ...they don't care .. they know EXACTLY whT they're doing, how they're acting and exactly the outcome of it all ...... they are "happy" with the dynamic bc it benifits them sooo.....theres no point 🤷🏽♀️
2026-10-03 09:37:02
3
Deborah Salling Raul :
nope nope nope!!!
2026-10-03 11:57:05
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Jemima Hamble526 :
its not gonna happen. they dont think there's an issue with their behaviour. no issue with them, why should they change
2026-10-05 04:42:51
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Kerry D 🇨🇦 :
❤️❤️❤️
2026-10-03 10:29:00
1
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