jungsoodzˣʰ :
i have a crush and hes exactly my type. he somehow crossed almost every single thing on the list ive been looking for. he prays 5 times a day, hes polite and kind, doesnt smoke/vape, and doesnt talk to women unless its necessary for work.
ive caught him staring at me so many times, only for him to quickly look away afterwards. maybe its just me seeing what i want to see, but its happened so often and felt so obvious that i dont know how to keep telling myself its just a coincidence.
i really hope hes the one for me. every day, i pray to allah, “if hes my future, please keep him safe for me. if hes not for me, please help me erase these feelings because im not strong enough to fall deeply in love only to be hurt. if hes good for me and im good for him, please unite us under your blessings in the best possible way.”
and honestly, it hurts so much to have these feelings for someone when we havent even had a beginning. i just want to know where this is going because this uncertainty is becoming so heavy. but im too shy to ask him about taaruf, getting to know each other, or whether theres already someone hes waiting for.
i dont know what to do anymore. do i wait, let go, or somehow find the courage to take the first step?
2026-10-05 12:34:43