marr
Region: US
Monday 05 October 2026 16:58:02 GMT
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Jonathon Schauer :
Literally how am I supposed to punish somebody for saying something misogynistic. Most I can do is cut them off
2026-10-05 20:56:04
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TheDunadan :
I didn't stop there. I forced them to listen to *why* things were wrong when I called out their sexism and racism. The next time the slipped and did it around me I chewed them out and left the gaming session (the main way we spent time together after ending up all over post-college). When they still refused to take any accountability and tried to frame it as me being too sensitive I kicked them all from our gaming server. Unfortunately even the ones not openly being bigoted ended up holding resentment against me for actually taking a stand so I've since ended up with and entirely new friend group that's mostly queer people and very few men and they're much better friends and I'm so much happier. And while it's much less frequently needed we do all hold each other accountable for our blind spots
2026-10-05 20:37:24
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user28842580442 :
I'm never punishing a grown man Are you crazy
2026-10-05 22:18:50
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Alice 🩰 :
So do you want nothing to be done 😐
2026-10-05 17:16:54
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fleeter97🇵🇸 :
ok, so what does it look like?
2026-10-05 17:11:55
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BugThug :
I agree with a lot of it. But I guess I’m wondering what consequences should look like? Like you said you can confront your friends on their misogyny. But I can if my punishment to them is say Leaving the friendship, they’ll just go back to their shit?
2026-10-05 18:34:57
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Gamma :
being a social outcast is a fear of all humans btw essentially what you're asking is for us to abandon community and isolate ourselves
2026-10-05 19:06:57
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Lazlo Lampert :
this aint Naruto youre not gonna talk no jutsu someone to change their ways, most you can do is cut em off. like if a dude is "uncomfortable" they are just gonna leave the situation and hang out with other misogynists
2026-10-05 21:51:31
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JzaTiger :
accountability is hard, especially when forcing it onto others who dont get it. it should be taught more
2026-10-06 03:19:03
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I’m Andrea Pirlo :
The only way accountability becomes meaningful is when the persons perspective is changed which is not as simple as it seems
2026-10-05 21:01:10
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EzDaBoi :
I can police him all I want when he is around but if he just fundamentally doesn't believe what he is doing is wrong we could fist fight and he will still go back to being that same person even after our friendship is done and over with if anything it will push him deeper into that manosphere bs because he is trying to fix. a way to be a fucked up person without being called out for it
2026-10-05 22:46:53
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isidro :
I mean the only we can do is confront if they are still doing that shit without our knowing we can't really do anything. now if they continue that behavior around us then yeah we stop being friends with them. im just confused with how you expect people to give punishments for things they don't know is going on. the only thing we can do tell them to stop or we won't be friends. its very limited as to what we can do individually at the end of the day the only way to end misogyny and is to topple patriarchy aswell as the systems that support it as a collective
2026-10-05 20:35:18
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M3taDee :
that’s why having genuine conversations with your hb is inportant
2026-10-05 19:54:15
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user_126623783232235 :
You haven’t been there. Don’t be bold to assume
2026-10-05 21:50:20
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Lil Miss Moon 🍉 :
At this point I feel like the only good men exist in fiction
2026-10-06 02:22:50
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CattAss :
Its the exact reason I only have one male friend lol. Being the guy that doesn't tolerate sexism just makes you the guy who doesn't get invited.
2026-10-05 18:48:03
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MasterShake :
How the hell am I supposed to police a grown ass man y’all act like just because we’re men that men are going to listen to us. Have you ever thought of all the men who are the weakest link in the friend group? What the hell are they gonna do? Men can kick our ass just as bad as they can kick yours.
2026-10-06 01:33:09
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Pierce Dawkins :
🤣🤣🤣
2026-10-05 21:08:55
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Trashboat :
I dont have any friends anyway but say I did have a male friend like you describe in the example, what "punishment" would you want me to bestow onto him? if he were speaking about that way about women I would definitely not want to be his friend or be around him at all, but beyond I dont really understand what you would have me do to force someone to be better. I feel this video speaks very strongly on what you dont like but it would be nice if you could speak on the actual actions you do want to see as well.
2026-10-05 18:15:33
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Kohn_Luke :
If you can’t call your friends out they ain’t your friends
2026-10-05 21:56:55
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Pseudonymsean :
It starts at holding yourself accountable.
2026-10-06 01:52:21
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yorch☭ :
I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who acts like they’re my parents your parents are supposed to teach you accountability not your friends
2026-10-06 02:14:54
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florallnfaded :
Ok so from what I can gather the crux of the argument here is saying “hey you cannot say *insert misogynistic phrase* about women” is not enough since it only reinforces that they can’t say this thing around you and you’re calling for more action. So what’s the threshold for consequence whether that be social or legal like you said. If you ostracize Johnny for being misogynistic he might say “dang I really shouldn’t be misogynistic” but he might also go “those guys are losers who can’t take a joke”. So while your argument I actually agree with being reprimand isn’t enough we also need to establish the tangible punishment you’re talking about. Just a thought tho
2026-10-06 02:40:03
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