Miguel Molina :
am tired of feeling like I am always there for everyone, but when I need someone, silence is the only thing that returns. Tired of being that person who listens, who gives advice, who accompanies, who remembers dates, who asks how you are even when no one asks about me. Tired of giving enormous affection and feeling like it never occupies the same space in the hearts of others.
It hurts to realize that you are important, yes, but never enough. That you are a “good friend,” a “great person,” “someone special,” but never anyone's favorite. Never the first option. Never that person they look for as soon as something good or bad happens in their lives. I always seem to be in an intermediate point where everyone likes me, but no one truly chooses me.
And the worst part is that you start wondering what is wrong with you. What you lack. Why it seems so easy for others to receive that reciprocal love that always slips through my hands. Because I do know how to love. I know how to truly care. I know how to stay. I know how to listen even when I am broken. But sometimes I feel like all of that is useless when it never returns with the same intensity.
It is exhausting to feel like you give versions of yourself that no one would give for you. To see how you make space for everyone while no one seems to make space for you. And still stay there, because even though it hurts, you end up getting used to being everyone else's refuge while having nowhere to take refuge yourself.
Sometimes I wish I could stop caring so much. Stop replying fast, being attentive, trying to be enough for everyone. Because it is tiring to feel like the love you give always weighs less when it comes back. It is tiring to see how people have “their favorite person,” their priority, their safe space… and understand that you have never been that for anyone.
And yes, maybe no one has the obligation to love us the same way we love them, but that doesn't keep it from hurting. It doesn't prevent that feeling of emptiness when you realize that probably no one thinks of you with the intensity with which you think of them.
2026-10-07 03:23:25