JORDAN XIDAS
Region: US
Thursday 08 October 2026 00:43:06 GMT
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rownmarqet :
understand DARVO! you'll see it everywhere!!!
2026-10-08 14:35:02
194
joyelynne1 :
Once I learned DARVO I leave these dynamics before I get too involved✌🏽
2026-10-16 13:44:04
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🍊range🌓weeb :
don't forget the bitch paradox when you finally react to abuse, they feel MORE justified because now you're a bitch
2026-10-08 02:41:23
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Meredith Moonbeam :
And the real victim will question themselves and ruminate on if they did anything to cause the problem but the abuser will not.
2026-10-08 03:28:07
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kasey :
Or when the abuser drives the victim to a point of snapping or reacting in defense so that they can say “look everybody, I told you she was crazy, look what she did/said to me”
2026-10-08 04:03:09
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Izzy :
I think victims also often feel like an abuser because of reactive abusive and genuine empathy for their abuser (who repeatedly paint themselves to be the victim, and deny any wrongdoing on their part)
2026-10-08 12:54:17
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Maddie :
Yea….. the abuser made me feel like I was the abuser to the point I went to therapy to stop being a so called abuser. Horrific
2026-10-08 02:26:42
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Philbo :
I had to go through intensive therapy for more than a year so I could trust my reality again because I was gaslit so much :))))
2026-10-08 03:01:07
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Space Monkey Jesus🦧 :
The real 'victim' walks away. Not as a tactic, but as the only viable solution, to end the war that the abuser started
2026-10-08 12:27:26
249
twangieboy :
i have a sense of entitlement to not being abused
2026-10-08 03:32:29
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Lupita ♡ :
he calls me mean because I dont put up with his abuse anymore.
2026-10-08 05:25:11
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tallandcurlyjr :
if the abuser is really advanced, theyll bring up reactionary abuse before you ever even do anything like it, to keep you from doing it.
2026-10-08 12:00:34
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flowersforangelica :
…..still unsure
2026-10-16 07:34:54
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1unar_gl1tch :
Nah. The abuser may act like the victim for sympathy but they know what they are doing. They know they are abusive deep down and they love it.
2026-10-08 12:18:29
115
Astroturtle024 :
please let me download this 🙏🏼
2026-10-16 11:04:57
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Kaʻū (they/them) :
This! I was in therapy bawling my eyes out because I thought I was the abuser in my last relationship. It turns out I was so emotionally abused and gaslit about circumstances that I questioned my reality so much that I just accepted that I was the problem. My therapist helped me identify the difference
2026-10-08 03:24:44
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In the Kitchen with Jules :
Thank you.
2026-10-15 02:29:45
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JustABitAlien :
Is it abusive to scream in a closet because your ex forced you to agree with him bringing another woman over to sleep with (he said it was abusive of me to scream)
2026-10-08 03:03:46
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Rish Kat 😻 :
And sometimes the victim feels like the bad guy or bad for the abuser and that validates the abusers abusive behaviour and that continues the cycle
2026-10-08 05:58:56
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KJ :
The victim often feels like the abuser because they have been told they are.
2026-10-08 03:39:31
27
Jo :
I just got out of a relationship, I posted this the other day.
2026-10-08 14:38:16
170
★☆Coyote🧿Curse☆★ :
Even simpler. the abuser feels like the victim because they are not allowed to continue doing harm to the victim.
2026-10-08 14:38:35
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stephanie_anne_o :
So there ARE men that can understand this. That is refreshing.
2026-10-08 17:48:52
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Everice :
And if anyone’s confused about this skip the core issue and pass judgement on the way the fallout is unfolding. Whoever is being aggro/cocky/domineering in the conversation is usually the guilty party. An innocent person usually over explains, frequently apologizes and never initiates contact. And only becomes agressive after a certain threshold is crossed (trigger phrase) within an interaction. Then the aggressor abruptly switches to claiming victimhood. If this framework doesn’t apply it’s likely not a classic abuser/victim dynamic
2026-10-08 03:57:00
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