@theonion: Growing increasingly whimsical as she unearthed the memory from decades ago, local grandma Agatha Fuller fondly recalled Friday how she had once worked with a homosexual. “His name was Alexander, never Alex, and his hair and his suit were always immaculate,” said Fuller, reminiscing about the law clerk she and other secretaries at the firm had tried setting up with their single friends the entire four months he worked there. “Alexander was a hoot—he had all us gals in stitches. He always smelled like lavender, and we used to tease him because he used an emery board to keep his nails short. Apparently one of the attorneys saw Alexander at a bar sharing a booth with another man, except Alexander and the man were sitting on the same side of the booth. The next Monday, his desk was empty, and I never saw him again.” Fuller acknowledged that she immediately knew something was different about Alexander because he never grabbed her ass or breasts the way her other male coworkers did.

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Friday 09 October 2026 21:05:00 GMT