@bibilakiran0: am choosing myself for once Don't worry about me, okay. I know it may look like 1 am fine because 1 still smile, I still reply to messages, and 1 still show up like nothing is wrong. But the truth is, I have learned how to hide my pain in a way that nobody notices. I have mastered the art of saying "I!'m okay" even when my heart feels heavy and my mind is exhausted. There are nights when I lie down and everything I tried to ignore during the day comes rushing back to me. The pressure. The disappointment. The silent battles. I carry so much inside, yet I rarely speak about it because I do not want to be seen as weak. So I stay quiet. I bleed quietly. 1 fix myself quietly. gave so much of myself to people who did not even realize how much it cost me. I stayed when I should have left. I forgave when I was deeply hurt. I kept choosing others even when they stopped choosing me. I loved with a full heart, and somehow ended up feeling empty. It hurts when you are always the strong one. People assume you do not need support because you never complain. They think you are unbreakable because you survive everything. But surviving is not the same as healing. Smiling is not the same as being okay. Sometimes I feel like 1 am only remembered when lam needed. Like my value is tied to what I can give, not who I am. And that realization breaks something inside you slowly. You begin to question yourself. You begin to wonder if anyone would notice if you stopped trying so hard. So if one day I decide to go quiet, please do not think it is weakness. It is not attention seeking. It is not giving up. It is self-preservation. It is me finally choosing to protect the little strength I have left. It is me stepping away from the noise so I can hear my own heart again. If 1 go offline, it will not be because I did not try. It will be because 1 tried too much. I tried to fix things that were not mine to fix. 1 tried to hold relationships together by myself. I tried to carry weight that was never meant for one person. I am tired of being strong in silence. I am tired of understanding everyone while nobody understands me. I am tired of forgiving people who never even apologized. I am tired of giving my best and being treated like it was nothing special. But please understand this clearly. If I disappear for a while, it iS not because am nothing, It is because I finally realized am something valuable. And something valuable should not be drained until it has nothing left to give. Maybe I just need space to breathe. Maybe I need time to rebuild the parts of me that broke quietly. Maybe I need to sit with my own thoughts and learn how to love myself the way 1 loved everyone else, And maybe, just maybe, when I come back, I will not be the same person. I will come back calmer. I will come back wiser. I will come back with boundaries. I will come back knowing that my peace is more important than pleasing everyone. So do not worry about me, okay. If I go offline, it is just me choosing healing over chaos, peace over pressure, and myself over everything that was slowly destroying me. And when I return, it will be with a heart that finally understands it deserves rest, respect, and real love too.

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2026-10-16 05:53:06

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