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Wednesday 21 October 2026 15:00:00 GMT
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Day 39 of 365! November 11, 2013. 5:30 a.m. I hadn’t slept a wink all night. I kept checking and double checking my hospital bag, making sure I packed anything and everything we could possibly need. My baby wasn’t due for another 3 weeks, but they were worried about his kidneys and needed to get him out to make sure he was okay. I was a nervous wreck, but it was time to load the car and go. We had just turned 23. What if I was a terrible mother? What if I couldn’t be what he needed from me? Jay was so excited to have a son, and tried to keep me calm, but he was just as nervous. I looked around our room at the bed he would sleep in, the clothes folded and ready for him. The next time I stepped into that room, we’d have a tiny baby with us. I just couldn’t believe it, even though I had the huge belly and hemorrhoids to prove it. 😂 They started slicing me open at 8:30 and by 8:32, we heard the sweetest sound and my whole world stopped. Dr. Nilson held our son up over the draping cloth, and his eyes were wide open, locking with mine. From that moment, I knew everything I ever did in this life would be for him. I thought I knew a mother’s love before that moment, but I was wrong. He was perfect. 8 lbs and 15oz of perfection. I couldn’t speak. All I could do was stare at him while tears ran down the side of my face into my ears. I couldn’t move, but everything in my soul reached for him. As soon as he heard his daddy’s voice, he snapped his gaze from mine and looked at him. It’s amazing how we knew without a doubt that he knew we were his. My birth story was not a pretty experience. I almost died, required emergency surgery and extended stays in the hospital, had to be on a wound vac for weeks and weeks, and lived with miserable pain for months. But, I’d do it all again in a heartbeat to have him. We have learned and grown so much throughout the last thirteen years. And no matter our faults, downfalls, and straight-up failures, this boy has been proof that we did something right in this life. He is so special, truly a one-of-a-kind kid. He is kind, emotionally intelligent, and more than I could ever hope for in a son. He is strong and resilient and understanding. He gives grace that I sometimes feel we don’t deserve. He is patient and the best big brother to his sisters, and I thank God every day that I get to be his mama. I know he will do great things. I know he can change the world. And I will be here, watching and loving him through every season. My baby, my big boy, the coolest kid, and now a young man. Happy 13th Birthday, son. I love you more than I could ever say. #proudmama #happybirthday #mysonshine
Day 39 of 365! November 11, 2013. 5:30 a.m. I hadn’t slept a wink all night. I kept checking and double checking my hospital bag, making sure I packed anything and everything we could possibly need. My baby wasn’t due for another 3 weeks, but they were worried about his kidneys and needed to get him out to make sure he was okay. I was a nervous wreck, but it was time to load the car and go. We had just turned 23. What if I was a terrible mother? What if I couldn’t be what he needed from me? Jay was so excited to have a son, and tried to keep me calm, but he was just as nervous. I looked around our room at the bed he would sleep in, the clothes folded and ready for him. The next time I stepped into that room, we’d have a tiny baby with us. I just couldn’t believe it, even though I had the huge belly and hemorrhoids to prove it. 😂 They started slicing me open at 8:30 and by 8:32, we heard the sweetest sound and my whole world stopped. Dr. Nilson held our son up over the draping cloth, and his eyes were wide open, locking with mine. From that moment, I knew everything I ever did in this life would be for him. I thought I knew a mother’s love before that moment, but I was wrong. He was perfect. 8 lbs and 15oz of perfection. I couldn’t speak. All I could do was stare at him while tears ran down the side of my face into my ears. I couldn’t move, but everything in my soul reached for him. As soon as he heard his daddy’s voice, he snapped his gaze from mine and looked at him. It’s amazing how we knew without a doubt that he knew we were his. My birth story was not a pretty experience. I almost died, required emergency surgery and extended stays in the hospital, had to be on a wound vac for weeks and weeks, and lived with miserable pain for months. But, I’d do it all again in a heartbeat to have him. We have learned and grown so much throughout the last thirteen years. And no matter our faults, downfalls, and straight-up failures, this boy has been proof that we did something right in this life. He is so special, truly a one-of-a-kind kid. He is kind, emotionally intelligent, and more than I could ever hope for in a son. He is strong and resilient and understanding. He gives grace that I sometimes feel we don’t deserve. He is patient and the best big brother to his sisters, and I thank God every day that I get to be his mama. I know he will do great things. I know he can change the world. And I will be here, watching and loving him through every season. My baby, my big boy, the coolest kid, and now a young man. Happy 13th Birthday, son. I love you more than I could ever say. #proudmama #happybirthday #mysonshine

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