@narcissisticabuse__: Hi, it's Juliana! I'd like you to imagine that you live in New York City. It's 11 pm, and you're trying to get home as quickly as possible. You have two options: 1. Walk for 20 minutes on the main road. 2. Walk for 5 minutes through a dark alley. Which one are you going to choose? You're probably going to choose the 20-minute walk, right? But this isn't because you hate that specific alley. It's because you've learned that dark alleys can be really dangerous. And the same thing can happen with the narcissistic person in your life. When they say something innocent like, "Hey, did you call the dentist?" It's not the words that irritate you so much. It's what you've learned those words can lead to. What do I mean? Well, when they say something like "Hey," your brain doesn't treat it like a simple "Hey." Because 9 out of 10 times, "Hey" is the beginning of things like: - Criticism. - An interrogation. - A guilt trip. - Being blamed for something. - Being picked on. So over time, your brain has learned to associate their voice with those experiences. Said differently: When the narcissistic person in your life speaks, your brain expects the interaction to be negative. So when they say something innocent and you immediately get irritated, you're not being a jerk. Your brain is just making an educated guess based on the hundreds (if not thousands) of negative interactions you've had with them before. If you need someone to talk to about all of this, you can always send me a DM or schedule a session with me. My team and I help people heal from narcissistic abuse, and many of us have experienced it ourselves, so we're here if you need us. To your healing, Juliana ❤️‍🩹

Narcissistic Abuse

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Saturday 17 October 2026 01:18:50 GMT