Nai Penzi
Region: US
Tuesday 20 October 2026 20:25:38 GMT
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✨orchard o' apricots✨ :
as a psychology major, whenever someone says "according to psychology" i NEED yall to know that whatever follows is gonna be un-nuanced bullshit.
2026-10-21 04:31:14
1421
clubratkat🪩 :
i just do it bc that’s what i’d want them to do for me
2026-10-20 22:55:14
2049
zacknotmorris :
well thats just stupid. if my loved one is hurting, I want them to not be hurting because I love them. I'm not frustrated, I want to help. I would expect the same from them.
2026-10-20 23:48:15
698
Sigma Overwatch :
when you complain to someone, you are bringing them into your distress. don't blame them for trying to fix it. (this is a post about men and women)
2026-10-20 23:32:42
1053
Austin J :
or maybe i wanna help? if theres a solution why wouldnt i offer it?
2026-10-21 01:13:53
122
Thomas :
so before you offer to fix something or give a solution ask yourself did they ask me to fix it? did they ask for a solution or did they just want me to listen
2026-10-21 01:24:06
13
dnice :
Yall miss the point. Empathy is the point. Telling someone you’re struggling isn’t automatically asking them to tell you how to handle it. Sometimes you’re saying, “This is really hard, and I want someone I trust to understand what I’m going through”. And hear them out before handing out advice. Advice can feel dismissive when someone has already decided what the problem is before you’ve finished explaining it. You’re still trying to be understood, and they’re already issuing instructions. No thanks.
2026-10-21 02:21:49
15
Zula :
or autistic and dont emote empathy the same way as neurotypicals. Humans aren't one size fits all...
2026-10-20 23:36:49
145
thatsecretthinx :
So this isn’t universal at all. It CAN be what’s going on, but for most people, it IS empathy. Sitting with it is fine. Immediately trying to fix it is fine. It just depends on the people involved and problem at hand. So, if you are overthinking whether or not you’re being empathetic or selfish, just remember that you can be both at the same time without it being some moral catastrophe.
2026-10-21 01:55:30
53
Boualexou :
This confuses a possible explanation with a psychological fact. Trying to fix someone’s problems can come from anxiety, but it can also come from care. The key is understanding why you feel compelled to help, not assuming that helping means you can’t tolerate discomfort. Empathy and problem-solving aren’t mutually exclusive (Batson et al., 1987).
2026-10-22 16:11:42
6
Renee :
As someone who trains crisis supporters, we talk about this in our training. its not a reflex to shame, but to be aware of, as a response to empathy sometimes, for people who feel a responsibility to help. we train people that connecting with empathy, and deeply listening, holding space, is helping, and does relieve distress for others.
2026-10-22 23:02:27
0
Nepo Baby Renesmee :
Whatever man leave me alone
2026-10-21 01:01:01
36
Raine :
if it's second hand anxiety, isn't that technically empathy?
2026-10-21 00:12:17
2
awkwardnerdcf99 :
Yall you still can help people, just be conscious of why ur doing it and whether it’s truly the advice that you think will help them the most and not the advice that makes you feel the most helpful (which I’m not at all accusing anyone of doing I’m just saying, it’s something I personally have to work on)
2026-10-22 17:11:18
1
Van Tades :
But if I have a solution to your problem, then it isn’t a problem anymore. I’d rather talk to you about other things than silently keep us both suffering.
2026-10-22 19:50:04
0
archangel1191 :
The next one of these will say, when your partner or friend is in distress and you just sit with them in silence instead of trying to help, it’s because you’re a psychopath…. 🙄
2026-10-20 23:43:11
22
ALCH :
This seems very wrong and situational 😭
2026-10-22 16:38:39
1
Courtney Boles :
I do it because they are hurting and I know ways to make the hurting stop . They don’t have to take my advice but if someone I know is struggling , I’m immediately offering all advice and knowledge I have on the subject because I will never sit and let them hurt , we’ll figure this out right now and make you feel better ♥️
2026-10-21 00:09:19
20
Disen Backer :
alright, ill just hit em with a million "aw that really sucks" cuz yall dont want advice based on similar life experiences 💀
2026-10-21 01:10:06
14
Godrick King :
yall aint be knowing this?
2026-10-20 23:53:43
9
Sus amon gus :
Yes the study by John Psychology.
2026-10-20 23:54:26
29
Atom :
so genuinely trying to help is just me trying to help myself? interesting 🤔
2026-10-21 00:20:58
12
They forget my name :
Hey, so I don't like that.
2026-10-20 22:55:00
6
datbboicg :
Let me get this straight… If I went to a friend and I was going on about a problem, if they try to help me fix that problem… That’s a negative thing? Got it.
2026-10-21 20:48:26
2
Anti-Zionist Floppa :
One thing about negative emotions is that “sit with it” is always the wrong way to handle it.
2026-10-21 12:49:12
4
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