Erin Tatum
Region: US
Wednesday 21 October 2026 22:20:29 GMT
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☆Har¡☆ :
what is grief if not love persevering?
2026-10-21 22:29:48
111
meep :
anger. but then relief.
2026-10-21 22:24:19
104
🍁🎃🍄Ashley🍄🎃🍁 :
Grief is a large ball in a container. It bumps into you so frequently. The ball never gets smaller. The container gets larger through time and support. The ball will still bump into you. It hurts the same. Just not as frequently.
2026-10-22 05:30:00
6
🪐 caitie 🗽 :
in many Indigenous cultures, cutting your hair after loss is a symbol of mourning, grief, and letting go. I'm not sure what your ancestry is but maybe have a look into your mom's ancestral lineage's grief practices when it comes to this decision. maybe it can become a ritual of honouring her. 🫂
2026-10-21 23:17:09
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PwincessWen :
Grief comes in waves for me, some are small and some are tsunami level. When Neil Degrasse Tyson said “time is linear”, I like to think that they are still living just not next to me in person but next to me in time if that makes sense. 🖤
2026-10-21 23:13:15
41
Erica :
Hair holds trauma. Do your thing girlie!
2026-10-22 00:57:23
5
Marissa :
Your Mom wouldn’t want you to hold onto the hair out of guilt or grief. Your hair is a physical embodiment of your love for her and your own willpower and you are going to donate the hair and all that energy to another person and I think that’s beautiful
2026-10-21 22:50:21
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unsure :
Keep talking about your grief & your mom.
2026-10-22 00:22:54
6
eat ur 🥦 :
youre intellectualizing. im a victim of that thought process too.
2026-10-22 02:05:12
2
Belle :
I have a unique relationship with grief and death. The two times I've lost people that felt like loosing more than a loved one but a direct piece of my heart, I shaved my head. Feeling like everything is out of my control and my hair is heavy and I don't have the emotional spoons to care for it, it HAS TO GO. You have already logic/rationalized through that change is inevitable and that it doesn't make barrier between you and her. Give grace, allow yourself to feel your feelings, and keep living the best way you can. Healing isn't linear and someday are harder than others. 🫶 My Gram and My little girl took pieces of my heart when they left this world.
2026-10-22 05:43:45
0
🟣PurpleHairFox🦊 :
Idk. 🤷🏼♀️I’m still processing the grief of losing my mom at 11 and I’m about to be 38. I was born on her birthday Dec 2. So I still celebrate her silently in my head. She passed Dec 31, 1999 at 40 and as I get closer to that age I feel like I should understand her better because she lost her mom at 11 and her mom was 38. So…. I’m processing a lot
2026-10-22 00:36:23
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Expert.opinions :
Baby; you’re doing grieving, and doing it your way, which is the only way to do it 🖤 it’s hard but the feeling of want to do this is YOUR way of grieving and living simultaneously, roll with it, there is no wrong answer when it’s yours
2026-10-21 22:42:17
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﹕ ꒰ა ♱ lune .ᐟ ֹ ₊ :
Grief is weird like that, it sucks! You’ll be giving her love for you to someone else who needs it just as much. Hair holds memories!
2026-10-21 22:25:53
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amandaneeley93 :
sending you a hug beautiful girl 💕
2026-10-22 01:44:22
2
salvadorignacioag :
it's diferent for everyone. I started to hold on to the must sweet and precious memorys. It will hurt but eventually love Will outgrow the sadness.
2026-10-21 22:55:53
1
Hot Pie Deity :
Keep doing little experiments. Make small but consistent changes to accommodate the new mapping in your brain of time and space between you and your mom. Allow your grief to come and go as it wants to. Keep trying. I am doing it too!
2026-10-21 23:51:03
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Ed :
The only thing that helped me after my Mom died was this. I'd picture her in front of me and I would ask her, "Do you want me to feel sad" and she would say, "No, I want you to heal and grow." At first any healing feels like a betrayal. But I think grief has a sense of self-preservation. When you start feeling better, the grief senses the end is coming and responds with guilt. Your Mom wouldn't feel that way at all. Hope this helps.
2026-10-21 22:53:44
0
user2518570952030 :
Erin, I’ve been reflecting on this as today is the second anniversary of my own dad’s death. I’ve felt a lot of the same grief that you’re describing here, particularly that sense of widening “cosmic distance” that comes with every new change following the loss. All I can say is that it DOES get better with time — as cliche as it sounds. It didn’t happen all at once or even in a measure I found noticeable, but looking back I can say with certainty that the feeling has diminished and I’ve started to find in life an assembly of cosmic connections with him instead. They’re in the things that remind me of him, the things I know he would do or say in those errant moments, and in myself and my own patterns. My advice to you is to keep going and to keep processing your grief in any way that makes you feel like you’re moving forward on it. It will get better with time, I promise.
2026-10-21 23:28:05
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angejusange :
Just feel all the feelings. Write her letters about it about how you feel and how much you love and miss her. And maybe how you want it cut. My mom has been gone 2 years and I still cry almost daily….. it will get easier
2026-10-21 22:52:16
5
Izzy Bee 🇨🇦 :
Your mom lives within you, you cary her in everything you do. I'm also wanting to chop off a lot of my hair.
2026-10-22 01:29:14
3
Lauren :
I’m wondering there’s room to think differently about it? Perhaps knowing that none of us make it out of this alive, the haircut can represent you getting closer to her in the cosmos because hair is just dead cells. Matter returning to earth and changing forms.
2026-10-21 23:57:24
2
mal (they/them) :
maybe you could keep a small lock and frame it or keep it somewhere you can access it when you want as a way to feel close to your mom and your previous self. i love that you’re trying to confront change, but creating space for grief rituals is also important and can make change less scary. 💙
2026-10-21 23:23:47
4
Stirling94_isonfire🔥Nina :
As part of my grief ritual I cut my braids off. Hair is sacred. I’ve grown my hair out since. The regrow was really the better part of the ritual personally because I have a physical visible marker of the amount of time I have survived without her. It’s bitter sweet. Cut your hair. It’s a powerful and somewhat harsh transition ,like the transition between living with them in this plane and living with them elsewhere.
2026-10-21 23:08:33
1
JadePeppermint :
I had to give up my love for finding dragons after my grandfather passed but now I look at dragons as a sign he's by my side
2026-10-21 23:33:23
1
Kay 🇦🇺 :
I’m post 5 years since my bestie passed away. The guilt never goes away but for me, I find the guilt of not doing the thing is worse than the guilt of changing. My bestie would be so mad at me if I was still the person that I was when I lost her and that keeps me going. Even though it hurts, every time something big happens, I know that she is there with me, even if I can’t talk to her. Your mum would be so proud of you
2026-10-21 23:05:57
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