Jess- Your Boundary Big Sister
Region: US
Tuesday 27 October 2026 11:24:29 GMT
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Auntie Tt :
I guess I need a lot more therapy because I would just say no and give the reasons you just stated lol🤷🏾♀️
2026-10-28 04:35:13
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Mel~Tok~Chaos :
No he’s wrong. You have to have a relationship with me before there’s one with my kids.
2026-10-28 14:22:57
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theindoorcat77🇨🇦 :
If fil can’t control himself with his wife in public or around others…I wouldn’t expect him to control himself with my kids. There is no way I would leave my kids alone with him. Plus…I don’t care what the mil is like…no way should they be treating each other like that. Janice please trust your gut and say no. No is a full sentence. Fil can’t just skip a generation of people and not even try to have a relationship with them and then expect alone time with your kids…no way!
2026-10-27 19:30:03
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Karen Amico :
I would just say “no that is not happening.”
2026-10-28 01:41:52
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user2529316258893 :
Just no. For more reasons than I have room to type.
2026-10-28 02:02:13
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🧿Mrs_Griffin🧿 :
No is a complete sentence
2026-10-27 11:51:50
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rhondamorgan557 :
what's wrong with just being truthful. telling the fil your relationship is volatile at family gatherings and even restaurants I don't trust my child to be in that environment alone.
2026-10-27 17:00:16
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The_Holiday_Armadillo :
I can only speak to my experience but I would say no. If you can't have a good relationship with your adult children you don't get unfettered access to their children. My husband's stepmonster was the affair partner and she tried to erase my husband's and his brothers' existence so she could pretend their child together was the only child. She was an unsafe person for our children to be around. If a parent doesn't like you or your spouse they will often times take that out on the children. I overheard stepmonster talking crap about my kids and I saying they were ugly because "have you seen their mom" and a bunch of other stuff. So no. They didn't get unsupervised visitation and my youngest (17) doesn't even know them.
2026-10-27 13:41:46
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Amanda Mayfield :
(Unrelated) but I told my dad that I don’t want any visitors the same day my baby is born but we will be having visitors the next day but he is telling me he is coming no matter what on the day my baby is born despite me trying to explain why I want that and me continuously telling him no and he’s threatened to kick us out ( we live in a guest house on his property that we pay to live in) if we don’t let him in the same day he is born
2026-10-27 16:47:37
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Jess- Your Boundary Big Sister :
Now, Grandpa may not be wrong! He might be an AMAZING grandpa without having a close relationship with his adult kids. But what I think he’s missing is that the parents need to trust him, especially if he wants one-on-one time with their children. So what do you think? Should grandparents need to have a good relationship with the parents to have one-on-one time with the grandkids?
2026-10-27 11:25:36
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bboysmomma :
My dad was a shitty parent but a awesome grandpa and did not like his wife. I started small amounts of time and built up with my kids. All though he is gone now my kids still talk about how much they loved hangingout and him teaching them about woodworking and riding bicycles with them. I could never replace the memories a grandparent gives a child.
2026-10-27 21:38:15
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TejanaMV :
My kids are my responsibility. They are my priority. Grandpa’s feelings aren’t more important, so I’m just telling him how it is without any qualms.
2026-10-27 11:37:32
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Chabeliz :
you tell them straight up
2026-10-27 20:58:37
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Shannon :
At the end of the day, if you can’t have a decent relationship with your child, you will probably not get to have one with their children.
2026-10-27 13:21:36
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aihp9 :
Don't let the kids go alone to grandpa 🤷♀️I agree that it is very unhealthy.
2026-10-27 11:30:48
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crimlawprof :
My inlaws are not allowed unsupervised access to the kids; the drive drunk, wouldn’t use carseats, have an unfenced pool (fine now, but not when the kids were little), and also do the fighting/screaming described by the post. They are a plane flight away and tried repeatedly to get us to send the kids by plane, and we said no. Now some of our kids are adults and won’t visit alone because they are old enough to see the behaviors and decide they don’t want to stay in their house (when everyone goes we rent a nearby air bnb). The grandparents may be hurt but they have to know how awful that is to be around.
2026-10-27 14:06:47
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erminetree78 :
We don’t send my son to his grandmothers house because she’s done zero work on baby proofing her home she refuses to by a baby gate and plug covers
2026-10-27 17:16:03
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user43044255025782 :
💯 if my spouse would agree not to be around unhinged family, i wouldn’t be around them at all. however, its an opportunity for parents to teach children how adults should treat each other. i wouldn’t advise exercising caution; unhinged people tend to romanticize get togethers, even if the parents would say there was unhinged behavior
2026-10-27 15:41:16
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Honestly_Rose00 :
That is a toxic environment. I think honesty is the best policy. The wife is the reason, why beat about the bush. Let him know he is welcome but she not. Exposing children to this is not reasonable.
2026-10-28 19:07:20
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sierra~recoveryqueensoberboss :
Just be honest
2026-10-28 02:00:23
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HF :
Why are we asking? “how”? He sounds like a terrible person living a terrible life. Why would you want that around your child? I think he should consider himself lucky he’s allowed to see the child at all. You say yes to things you’re comfortable with and you say no the things you’re not comfortable with and that’s the end of the story. Point the fingers, say the truth, stop trying to be polite to people who treat you like garbage.
2026-10-27 12:54:54
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Moscow :
😁😁😁
2026-10-27 15:26:39
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