Dr. Vincent Barbieri
Region: US
Tuesday 27 October 2026 18:48:31 GMT
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Matt :
Idk I’ve used “that wasn’t my intention” in apologies sometimes partly because I want to convey that I was stupid not malicious
2026-10-27 21:39:50
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Hilyconsultation :
let me save this
2026-10-28 00:33:05
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CassCass :
what bothers me is people think taking accountability means just owning it.. like "yeah I know im an asshole to you, I know I hurt you" , and they dont feel bad about it or acknowledge how its hurtful
2026-10-27 20:38:57
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AnimateRach :
What if you do say that to show you weren’t being malicious, and it’s said genuinely..and then followed up with ‘but I can see that it caused harm and don’t want to repeat that’ and then try to do better?
2026-10-28 00:52:23
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clarareeser :
My Autistic spouse described perfectly.
2026-10-27 21:44:11
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haley ᵕ̈ ⋆˙⟡˖ :
I like when someone says ‘I didn’t mean to harm you or hurt your feelings’. I think a lot of hurt feelings come from honest miscommunications and it gives me peace knowing it wasn’t intentional and they can be more aware of it moving forward.
2026-10-27 20:24:20
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Isabel McArthur :
Oh yeah - people who refuse repair are notorious for refusing to do it themselves
2026-10-27 20:03:01
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Dr. Vincent Barbieri :
Apologies for my very visible booger
2026-10-27 18:53:40
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carrrrlz :
as soon as i hear a “that’s not how i remember it but sorry you feel that way. it wasn’t my intention” i’m out. i won’t be in any relationship with someone who can’t take an ounce of accountability. “i’m sorry my behaviour made you feel that way, i never want to hurt you, i’ll do better in the future” is so similar yet soooo much better.
2026-10-27 19:16:31
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Jred :
So what to you do if you’ve take accountability, acknowledged their feelings, understood the hurt you caused them but nothing ever changes in the other person mind.
2026-10-27 20:36:24
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🏆 Lina :
It’s alwaysssss a joke, maneeee 🙄
2026-10-27 21:48:45
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Phish Food 🦞 :
My ex husband cheated when I was pregnant and I agreed to take him back since it was such a vulnerable time for me. He then did it again and took no responsibility. He told me he didn’t care and was going to divorce me when I tried to hold him accountable. He gave me the silent treatment for weeks, and I was so lonely and going through post-partum depression that I talked to a random guy online. I asked my ex husband if he was still divorcing me, and he said yes. So I ended up having a fling with this other person. My ex husband then got angry, said I cheated on him, and wanted me to take responsibility for cheating even though he cheated multiple times and told me he was leaving me 😂
2026-10-27 23:00:09
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Guitarfather :
Here is my issue - not everything needs to be rounded up to a slight, especially to a degree where there needs to be an accountability conversation. It can feel like yoi are constantly being corrected. In some cases, the other person os anxious, or irritable - sure they had a “perceived slight” but that perception is colored by their anxiety erc. That is equally damaging and exhausting IMHO
2026-10-27 21:59:07
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DarkTriadExpert :
The narc I know doesn’t even bother to say these things. She just denies she did/said anything wrong.
2026-10-27 18:58:38
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Tay :
"I'm sorry you feel like I was angry and mean"
2026-10-27 21:50:36
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lindshee :
What about cases where someone assumes or even insists there was bad intent that wasn’t there and isn’t just discussing harm or their feelings about it?
2026-10-27 20:52:52
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@mamalaurac :
My favorite was “you know that’s not me.” Umm sir, you behaved that way, so, yes, that is you.
2026-10-27 20:43:49
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bookfairy26 :
That’s when you Uno Reverse on them. You take their same position and then no one is emotionally responsible for either persons emotions lol
2026-10-27 20:58:05
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Erin Glover :
One of my favorites is “mistakes were made”
2026-10-27 20:40:43
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mshina_fiha :
I told my supervisor that we are not taking care of peoples wellbeing at our workplace when it comes to workload managment, adequate staffing, turn-taking for executive tasks, instead of getting questions concerning this and how to resolve this , she started crying, now I have to say sorry and manage my supervisor emotions, am I in the wrong , am I emotionally irresponsible or am I being manipulated.
2026-10-27 20:33:45
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zamzzz99 :
What should someone say when you actually did not consciously intend to do x,y,z then?
2026-10-27 21:26:04
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Melissa Burke :
Thank you for naming this. I’ve been stuck in confusion over this kind of behavior in a situation.
2026-10-27 21:28:27
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peaceandhappiness179 :
Wow, I've heard all of these. Yes, this is correct. ✔️
2026-10-27 20:25:59
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Erica Kaye ✨️ :
"nobody's perfect"
2026-10-27 21:05:42
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Rex :
She's said if the roles were reversed she'd go off and work on it on her own without relying on me. Clearly that's projecting and what she wants me to do but I feel like that's my answer, she's not going to engage
2026-10-27 21:43:32
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