it's all in the reason of the need. one needs what one has not developed. it is usually not developed either because the discipline required to eradicate the need is particularly unappealing to the person (so they have simply selected other paths and means to follow in life)...OR they are in denial of their shortcomings...usually because it is something considered shameful (which is NOT the angle or viewpoint anyone would wish for their relationship to be based or founded on)...especially when they can hardly bear to even observe it or be self conscious of it's existence. however, that need/shortcoming must be faced or at least admitted to find the partner that fulfills the need. the real issue with that, though, is that the person that doesn't share that particular weakness...like that's what THEY'RE strongest at...are probably going to view your falling extremely short on it as a disgusting trait. so even if one sought out the person who could fulfill the need, they probably wouldn't really feel reciprocal. if there was an appeal to fulfilling your own need...you would never have evolved into a position of needing that thing in the first place...make sense?
and when was the last time you feel particularly tolerant of meeting someone else's shortcoming that was never a struggle for you? you just see it as them being weak.
2026-10-31 07:24:26
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