@jeni.around.the.b: Nine months. 3.9.26 🧡🕊️🌿 …. since James left this earthly life. Nine months without my husband, my soulmate, my best friend, and the man who walked beside me for 42 years. There’s something about these nine months that has been weighing especially heavy on my heart. When James and I had been dating for about a year, we went our separate ways. For nine months, we lived our lives dating other people. But somehow, love found its way back, and we found our way back to each other. This time, for the remainder of his life. And here I am, nine months without him again. Only this time, he isn’t coming back. There won’t be another reunion, another chance to pick up where we left off, or another lifetime of ordinary days together here on earth. And that reality is sometimes more than my heart knows what to do with. But during the sermon at church this morning, I was gently reminded of something my heart needed to hear. This separation, while permanent here on earth, is not forever. Because of the promise of Heaven, I hold on to the beauty of knowing that one day James and I will be reunited. And what a glorious reunion that will be. 🥹 Lately, I’ve felt a little emotionally numb. I think part of that comes from knowing what lies ahead. I’m mentally preparing myself for what I believe will be the hardest stretch of this first year without him. Thanksgiving, Christmas, welcoming a new year, Valentine’s Day, and then March 9th. The first anniversary of the day my whole world changed. One after another, days and traditions that have always included him. I’m trying not to grieve those days before they arrive, but sometimes my heart gets ahead of me. I still decorate my home. I still laugh, find reasons to smile, and count my blessings. I’m reaching for the comfort of familiar traditions while accepting that they will never feel quite the same. And through it all, I’m leaning on my faith. Trusting God to give me the strength, grace, and peace I need, one day at a time. I may not understand this journey, but I know I don’t walk it alone. And I hold tightly to the promise that our earthly goodbye isn’t the end of our story. Nine months later, I still miss the simplest things. His voice, his laughter, his presence in our home, his chair, those morning forehead kisses. Just knowing he was here. I don’t know exactly how I’ll navigate these next few months. There will be laughter mixed with tears, gratitude alongside heartache, and days when simply getting through will be enough. But I’m learning to give myself grace. Being quietly strong doesn’t mean I never fall apart. Sometimes it simply means allowing myself to bend, trusting God to help me find my footing again. All those years ago, nine months apart ended with finding each other again. These nine months have taught me that my faith carries the promise of a heavenly reunion. And while I won’t get to welcome you home again in this lifetime, James, I will spend the rest of mine loving you. Still my soulmate. Still my love. Still mine, just in a different way. 🧡🕊️🌿

JeniP

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Monday 09 November 2026 06:58:47 GMT