@pedsdoctalk: If your kid can yell “I’m SO mad!” and still throw the game piece, they’re right on track 😅   Kids get a loud alarm system early and decent brakes much later. The prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain that handles impulse control, keeps maturing into the mid-to-late twenties. So knowing a feeling and managing a feeling are two different skills, and they grow at different speeds 🧠   It’s a lot like riding a bike. Knowing how the pedals work doesn’t mean you can ride without wobbling, and most kids need an adult jogging alongside way longer than anyone planned 🚲   A few things about emotions to keep in mind: ✔️ Anger often shows up as it conceals another emotion underneath. “I hate soccer” might really mean “I felt embarrassed when I missed that goal.” ✔️ Offer guesses, not verdicts. “Maybe you felt embarrassed when they laughed?” lets your child correct you. “You’re just embarrassed” usually starts a debate. ✔️ All feeling should be honored. Blanket claims can be gently questioned. “I feel left out” deserves respect. “Nobody likes me” might need a gentle second look once everyone’s calm. ✔️ Validation can be one sentence. “You’re disappointed. We’re still leaving.” No speech required.   And a meltdown isn’t a report card. If your child says “I was mad because I wanted to win” an hour later, that counts as learning.   Head to the link in bio to read today’s free newsletter, “Big Feelings, Growing Brains: What Emotional Intelligence Really Looks Like in Kids.”    In it I cover what to expect from toddlers to tweens, what research says about forced apologies (kids see right through them 👀), how to raise kind kids who don’t feel responsible for everyone’s mood, and a simple one-week challenge you can start in the car tomorrow.   Share this with a co-parent who grew up hearing “you’re fine,” and follow for more on raising emotionally healthy kids 💛   Which feeling is toughest in your house right now? Anger, disappointment, jealousy, something else?   #emotionalregulation #emotionalintelligence #toddlerdevelopment #bigfeelings #toddlertantrums

Dr. Mona

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Region: US

Tuesday 10 November 2026 17:03:03 GMT