@nickmatiash: Don’t ask her to split the debt when you ran up the bill in your marriage.

Marie :

Why would I "fix" something I didn't break? 🤦‍♀️

Girlinpink :

I didn't breake this. I'm not doing any more work. Period.

Rachel Rodman :

Yeah, I didn’t shatter his heart, lie, lie again, watch myself cry and beg for love, yet anytime fixing our marriage came up he immediately threw it back at me while he hasn’t done anything. Never a single thing. He finally ran out of time and I thank God I saw it early enough to leave and have my whole life ahead of me

Men Are Human :

Do you sell the scorecards you are insisting you use in marriage?

thetidalhearthwitch :

I did all the waiting. I did all the therapy. All he does is…once a week come and ask me “so, I’m still confused on our status” and I say “you told me I was horrible and you were done the very last time. Now we are living like platonic partners until I can figure out how to get you, with no income, out of MY house” and he acts shocked and awed when HE put it in writing multiple times that we are DONE and I’m a SHITTY partner.

holyeffword 🔻 :

that whole idea of 'it takes two to tango' is a complete falsehood in abusive situations.

Summer :

He just told me "I feel like I'm the only one putting effort into this and your victim mentality is keeping you stuck in the past". He feels superior because he came clean about cheating 15 times (took 7 years to tell me and says no man does that, that I should be grateful he did). Treated me horribly for 17 years and I finally woke up, I'm done. Now I just sit back and laugh about how cliche he is.

MsAndrist :

The Invisible Economy: The True Value of the Stay-at-Home Mother Research consistently demonstrates that the unpaid labour performed by stay-at-home mothers represents one of the most significant and systematically undervalued contributions in modern economies. Studies show that the average stay-at-home mother works approximately 97 hours per week — equivalent to holding two and a half full-time jobs simultaneously, with no sick leave, annual leave, or superannuation contributions (Welch's Family Survey, 2018). When her labour is mapped against market rates for equivalent roles — including chef, childcare worker, nurse, teacher, household manager, chauffeur, and psychologist — economists estimate her work would command in excess of $200,000 per year, plus benefits (Salary.com Compensation Research, 2023). Despite this, unpaid domestic labour is entirely excluded from GDP calculations, rendering it statistically invisible in national accounts — a structural omission that the United Nations has formally identified as a critical gap in economic measurement (UN System of National Accounts). A partner who contributes only a paid income to a household is, by economic definition, receiving the equivalent of $200,000 worth of labour annually at no cost — labour that directly enables his own workforce participation, health, and quality of life.

MindMoss ✨ :

Does it actually happen though?

left.me.drowning :

I did everything way too long by myself. I'm exhausted. I'm not fixing anything. He can

Phoenix & Me :

EXACTLY!!!

Bill :

I think the problem in most cases is that neither spouse is willing to be fully accountable for ALL the harm they’ve caused. So they both want the other to give more based on their own perception of the ratio. Getting hung up on every last detail is just going to cause more harm… better to take responsibility for yourself and not expect much from the other side.

🧿 Cassey 💙🇺🇸 🧿 :

Repairing the marriage kept falling on me so much that I told him that I am completely hands off repairing anything. I'm here. If he wants this marriage, then he will fix it. If not, I've made my peace and I'm good walking away, too, but we're living apart while he figures it out. It took him three whole months before he decided he was tired of "walking on your (my) eggshells" and I ended it officially. 16 years of marriage. He refused to fight for us. But he doesn't hesitate to tell me he still has hope he has a chance. No. you made your bed. I'm not fixing the problems you caused anymore.

ghostpants09 :

He truly believes that my saying that I’m hurt by his insults is abusive to him.

Sydney Bates :

Now show up on his page😅 I’ll do work but my life trauma has come from his addiction in the past. Praise the Lord he’s 4 years clean but the work on the relationship paused while he worked his recovery

Bake :

She is not staying in any longer. Will continue my work

OhBoySavage :

My response was after 10 years of harm, including verbal abuse, financial basically as well, mixed in with “small” yet constant forms of cheating throughout those years and having 3 kids despite me clearly stating in the beginning how I felt about certain things and still gave him so much love and “understanding” for yearssss, I ended up cheating on him with someone for a few months. Now I will be treated like crap and be given crap for what I did forever, because what I did “was worse”…..

JessicaRebuilds :

Amen!!! Even when we try, we CANT fix what we didn’t break. Context, he cheated for 7years I had no clue and his mindset stayed with 50/50 and angry about the pain he caused… I’m divorced now

Cjc :

Thank you i needed this

Amie 🇨🇦 :

I told him a year before I said I wanted a separation that I hated our marriage. He did nothing to fix anything. Didn’t even ask. Looked at me when I told him and said nothing. Gave him a year and I realized no I was done caring about the marriage, being the married single mom etc. He was shocked when I told him I was unhappy and wanted out

andi.saja :

What should I do as the husband who is the victim of her infidelity?

Ilona🎀 :

He caused all the damage and I still tried to do all the work, go to therapy and stuff. And I waited half the way for years, but he never got there so I pulled away. And now he has the nerve for accusing ME for mental abuse. After all the lies, drinking and gaslighting for 11 years. Well, ok then!😂

Loel :

CHARMAIN :

yeah , too late ✌🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽🏃🏽💨

Nichole Keenan :

Ugh I want to send this to my husband but I’m afraid