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@milky.ler:

milky.ler
milky.ler
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Sunday 30 May 2021 07:02:04 GMT
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I'm not irritable with my safe person. I am autistic and ADHD, and what looks like snapping at him is actually my nervous system hitting overload before I even realize it. By the time I'm short with him, I've usually been masking all day — holding eye contact, filtering noise, translating tone, all the invisible labor of an autistic brain in a neurotypical world. He just happens to be the first safe place I can finally put it down. It's not that he did something wrong. It's sensory overload and emotional dysregulation hitting at the same time, and he's the only person close enough to catch it. Co-regulation goes both ways — I need him calm so my body can borrow that calm back. I used to think this made me a bad partner. Now I know it makes me an autistic, ADHD person whose safe person absorbs the exhaustion nobody else sees. #audhd #adhd #actuallyautistic #neurodivergent #autism
I'm not irritable with my safe person. I am autistic and ADHD, and what looks like snapping at him is actually my nervous system hitting overload before I even realize it. By the time I'm short with him, I've usually been masking all day — holding eye contact, filtering noise, translating tone, all the invisible labor of an autistic brain in a neurotypical world. He just happens to be the first safe place I can finally put it down. It's not that he did something wrong. It's sensory overload and emotional dysregulation hitting at the same time, and he's the only person close enough to catch it. Co-regulation goes both ways — I need him calm so my body can borrow that calm back. I used to think this made me a bad partner. Now I know it makes me an autistic, ADHD person whose safe person absorbs the exhaustion nobody else sees. #audhd #adhd #actuallyautistic #neurodivergent #autism

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