@mmadeloserr: He starts pre-k tomorrow!! Somehow that sentence feels so much bigger than I thought it would. I’ve spent the last 4 years being his person. The person who knows his routines, his moods, his favorite things. I know the difference between a cry because he’s tired and a cry because something is actually wrong. I know what overstimulates him & I know how to calm him down. I know the things he can’t tell me with words. & Tomorrow, someone new has to learn all of that. Something that took me 4 years to perfect. I’m excited for him. I really am excited. But I’m also wondering if he’ll look back for me. If he’ll be scared. If he’ll want to go home. I’m wondering if he’ll struggle with the transitions, all the new faces. I’m wondering how he’ll communicate when he needs something and can’t find the words and I’m not there to be his voice. Tomorrow, the house will be quieter. Lijah & I will have to find things to fill our days. & I already know I’m going to miss the noise. My tiny little 6lb baby is growing up. Even though I’m so beyond proud of him, I’m not ready to let go. Not yet. #sahm #autism
